Ridiculously bored and unmotivated

I have a new position at work.  I started training in June so it’s been a couple months and I’m well into the groove of things, though I have questions for teammates that come up from time to time.  I like my manager and I like my team.  And I have not felt so bored in ages.

Seriously, ridiculously bored.  To the point where I want to look for work at a new company but most likely won’t because who has the time to look for new work when you have a perfectly good job and the money is enough that starting over anywhere is not feasible?  So I feel stuck.  It may even out over the next few months, and after six months in a position you can apply for other departments, so I may just hold out for that.

My hours and days off are also different so we have to farm out the kids three days a week now instead of two.  We were very lucky to have a friend of Velvet’s offer to watch them and they really like her and her kids, so that part is good.  But the expenses do add up and only having two days off instead of three days really makes a difference to how I feel when my weekend is over.  It never feels long enough.

We’ve signed up Ezra for preschool this year and are now waiting back to get confirmation on that.  Hopefully sooner rather than later because I think the school year is starting in a week or two.

Jesse was verbally told that the company he is interning at is offering him a position and they’ve already started the paperwork but they haven’t had the talk about salary and benefits or anything of that, which I think is a bit odd.

Jesse has been wanting to move from our house for awhile now and we’ve entertained the idea of selling and moving to a new location, but I hate the idea of moving farther away from Velvet and her brood.  And I really hate packing up a house.  So now the tentative plan is to get a refi on the house for more than we owe so we can fix up the house a bit.  I’m talking new roof, lawn and sprinklers, maybe central air.

I also want a new van and Jesse would get the Subaru, but we’re still paying off credit cards and then Jesse’s student loans are going to start in repayment this fall so I’m not sure how feasible that dream is because then we’d have two car loans instead of just the one.  The good news is we are SO close to paying off one credit card.  I haven’t been buying new items for resell and am focusing on selling off what inventory I currently have.  I’m going to reevaluate whether I want to do the resell thing after the new year.  I mean, I’ve been in the black with that for over a year, but I hate having inventory on hand and it’s just taking up so much space in the spare room.

Ezra has found the delights of Minecraft.  He freaking LOVES that game and I find it pretty dull.  He wants me to play it with him and I have but really I have no interest.  I have a rule that he cannot play it until after noon, and that he has to practice writing his letters first.  I bought some practice paper on Amazon but he is not too keen to practice writing.  I kid you not, it sometimes takes three hours to get him to practice four lines of As.  I’m like, “You could be playing Minecraft right now!  This should only take about five minutes!”  But no, that paper is still sitting there a couple hours later.

I think the problem is that I’ll have the TV on, or he will decide to play on his tablet instead.  We need to have a rule where we limit his screen play time.  I wouldn’t mind so much if he were playing games where the object is spelling or math or something.  I guess Minecraft is ok in the sense that it’s building his creativity in that he can LITERALLY build whatever he wants in that game.  A friend at work said her daughter built a conveyor belt that produces cats.  That’s all it does.  She doesn’t do anything with the cats so she just has a crap ton of them in her land.

I finally finished That 70s Show.  I took it from start to finish.  I also rewatched Grey’s Anatomy lately, and the first two seasons of Penny Dreadful.  Now we’re going through Netflix’s Stranger Things.  It’s good but pretty creepy.

I started walking on the treadmill again and wouldn’t you know it, about three days later my left heel started KILLING ME.  It hurt so bad when I walked on it.  Yesterday morning I *almost* didn’t walk but I took it at a slow pace and slowly ratched up the speed and that helped.  And this morning when I woke up it didn’t hurt as much when I started walking!  My left calf is also strained so I think those muscles connect somehow and are just jacked up.  I should probably be stretching first but I figured walking wasn’t that much of a strain.  Eventually I need to reevaluate my eating habits as well (as I sit here eating homemade fudge) and then maybe I’ll see some movement.

I asked a friend about her weight-loss procedure she had done, the gastric sleeve, but it’s just such a permanent thing.  They literally cut like 70% of your stomach out.  I feel like if I’m only going to be eating maybe a half-cup of food anyway, I should just do that now, like I should have the willpower to just do that already and then I wouldn’t need to go through surgery.  Because I’d still have the mental emotional ties to eating that I have now, surgery wouldn’t fix that.  She was telling me that a part they take out secretes the hormones that send signals that you’re hungry, so that helps.  But my problem isn’t that I don’t get the signals that I’m hungry or full, it’s a whole other issue.  I don’t know.  Something to think about, I suppose.

In closing, I feel bored, unmotivated, slightly depressed, but still keeping on.  Keep your fingers crossed that I figure things out, will you?

Another quiet night

*I forgot the post this back at the end of June…Enjoy!*

Last night was the final night of my solitude.  Jesse and the boys came back home today after their long camping weekend.  I’m happy they were able to go camping and be with his family and I’m happy I had a few days to myself.

Last night was spent making penis soaps for a bachelorette party and I actually did some training with Benny as well.  The soap is surprisingly realistic looking, and I thought it was fun trying to come up with different flesh tones.  Hopefully the ladies will like them as well.

With Benny I worked on Sit, Down, Wait, Leave It, Touch, Paw, Find It, and I introduced a new skill of Back.  He picked up Back pretty quickly.  I also tried giving him the idea that anytime the doorbell rang he should head to his mat instead of running to the top of the stairs but I’m having difficulty relaying the message.  When the doorbell rang and he went to his mat I treated him, but then I had to coax him off his mat so he could repeat it.  I’d ring the bell again and he’d just look at me because I had literally just called him over to me.  I’m sure I’m missing a step somewhere.  Will have to look into or ask my training forum folks.

I decided to tackle the backyard the other night after I got home.  We had been letting the grass and weeds grow with the thought that larger weeks would soap up more weed killer, but then we decided it probably didn’t matter much either way and so the grass and weeds kept going.  I started up the mower around 8:30pm and only got about half of it done before I had to call it a night.  I would have stayed out later but the mosquitoes were out in full force.  It appears I only got one bite for my troubles, so that’s good.  Some parts of the lawn are so tall that I had to leverage the mower up above the grass and then come down like a weed wacker, and then I mower back and forth over it.  The part I was able to mow looks really good.  I may attempt the other part of the yard tonight when I get home.

We still have not planted any garden items yet.  Every year I have these big plans and usually they don’t get done.  We may just plant a couple planters and call it good.  We may try to kill off the main garden area by covering the ground for the year and then starting fresh next season.  I’m not sure what we’ll do.

Ride, captain ride, upon your mystery ship

Jesse took the boys camping for the weekend, so I have the house to myself for a couple days!  It’s nice to have the peace and quiet but it also means I wig myself out that I’m going to be stabbed to death by an intruder.  My only solace is that nobody else is home so they would continue to live on, whereas if everybody was home we’d all die.  Sunny thoughts, I know.  Also, Benny freaks out whenever anything attempts the dog door so I think that would probably alert me to any shenanigans.  These are the thoughts I comfort myself with when it’s time to sleep.  And that is what I worry about when I’m alone at night, intruders and zombies.  Or intruding zombies.  It’s sixes either way.

Exciting news!  I interviewed for and scored a new position at eBay!  Currently I do tech support for the listing tools, and now I’m moving to MSO which is support for our very-large-volume members.  I’m pretty excited for this new position, I think it’ll open up a wealth of new learning opportunities for me.  One of my coworkers mentioned we’d been in this department for over four years now, and I was like, no, it’s been about two years.  But in reality, I moved to the listing tools department a few months after Ezra was born, so it *HAS* been over four years!  Crazy, right?!  I guess that’s a sign of a good department and a good manager when you forget how long you’ve been in one place.

I had Velvet cut off all my hair the other night.  That’s right, I went full mohawk again.

mohawk 2016

mohawk 2016

I figured it was time.  Also I was bored with my hair, and cutting it off seems to be my MO.  After she cut off my hair, Velvet touched up Kate’s mohawk, and then did a side cut on Grace.  We’re all cooling off for the summer!  I’m trying to decide if I think my top is a little long, or if I want to grow out the top and then do a poofy/bouffant style with the length.  The trouble is, it will probably take at least a year to grow into that length (if not longer) and how am I supposed to style it in the meantime?  I will probably end up cutting it shorter.  I’m so glad Jesse doesn’t seem to mind when I do this.  With a less feminine hairstyle I do feel like I need to wear makeup, so I’m having to get into the swing of eyeshadow and liner again.  Good times!

I had great plans to do some training sessions with Benny last night since no one else was going to be around.  Do you think I followed through?  No, I did not.  Instead I contemplated vacuuming the house but didn’t do that either.  I settled for binge-watching The Mindy Project and did the dishes.

It’s story time!

We’ve been reading to Ezra at bedtime pretty regularly for quite awhile now.  Recently we gave him some “learning to read” books that Jesse had from his time as a teaching aide.  At least, I think that’s where he got them.  Or maybe Mary gave them to us…  In any event, we’ve been reading these new books, which are very similar to slim manuals, at night.  On the back page there are about four comprehension questions that we ask him and he is really good at answering them!

The books are numbered and the lower numbers are really basic stories and concepts while the upper double-digits are much more complex.  He’s pretty good at answering the questions from either side of the spectrum, although sometimes he needs a little prodding.  Last night after we were finished he said, “Aren’t you so impressed with me, mom?” and I kissed him and told him I was always impressed with him.  He’s not really hurting for confidence but I think it’s important to always bolster that confidence because you know there’s going to be a time he’s less than confident and he’ll need something he can think back to and feel good about.

Ezra is awesome about sharing.  He always wants to share treats with us, or his brother, or his cousins (who he may not see for a couple days so he always wants to store his concoctions in the freezer for them until he sees them again).  He’s getting into building with his lego blocks and is getting pretty solid at playing by himself and making up themes and stories to go along with his games.

A couple nights ago Ezra decided he wanted to tell us a story, so he told us about Fairy Wishland, where there were one million fairies and they gave three wishes each.  At first he said that you could only get three wishes total, and not three from each fairy.  We asked what his three wishes would be, and I don’t recall his first wish (I know it was something amusing), but I remember he wanted a salami house (literally a house made out of salami), and then an ice cream house.  We told him he’d have to keep the ice cream house at the North Pole so it wouldn’t melt.  He said if it *did* melt we would lick it off ourselves to get clean.  Then he changed his tune and said we could have three wishes from every fairy.  We tried to explain the wishes wouldn’t be as precious then, but that didn’t seem to bother him.

Ezra went in for his first dental checkup on Thursday.  He was a little apprehensive so I had him watch me get mine done first and then he went off to his own chair like a champ.  He does have two cavities that will need to be filled, and our dentist’s brother is a pediatric dentist in the same building so we were sent over there to schedule an appointment to get those cavities taken care of.  I feel bad that we didn’t implement a strict tooth-brushing regime until about two months ago but it is what it is and I cannot change it now.  Leopold has teeth, we should probably get started on a brushing routine for him as well.  As an aside, I still have no cavities!  (I have a couple “shadows” and “pre-cavities” but those have been there for ages and are hardly worth mentioning, right?)

Back at work…again

A little late with this post.  I had the best intentions to blog during the parental leave I had, but you know, life gets in the way and lots of things happened and now I’d be hard pressed to describe in detail anything that occurred.  I know we hung out with Velvet and her brood a bunch.


I can say that mom came to visit for awhile, we visited dad at some point, I had some Amazon sales.  You know, just life.  So let’s just say the sabbatical was great, and I am very grateful to eBay for them to give me the leave.

Leo just turned one on Monday.  He’s such a big, happy boy!  Mom and Jim made it for a couple days and it was great seeing them.

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Leo had his first haircut while mom was here.  His fringe was over his ears and he was tugging at it all the time.  It’s a bit more trimmed now, but it’s not like he had a lot to begin with.

Leo's first haircut

Leo’s first haircut

We’re supposed to go to Oregon in August for the Baugher reunion but I don’t know if I will have the time off built up to take it.  Right now I’m hoarding all PTO to use for our Disneyland/Salisbury reunion happening in June.

Jesse started his first day of his internship this past Monday.  It seems like he really likes it and enjoys going to work every day.  I think he’d probably like it better if he didn’t have to be there at 8am, but all in all it seems a good fit.

We seeded a portion of our backyard with grass in an effort to change it from a dirt pit to something more livable.  We did get grass to grow, but we also have a lot of weeds that decided our freshly manicured dirt was a good place to get a grip.



We will be using weed killer pretty soon (which I hate to do but we need to get a handle on this yard) and then will probably seed more grass after the weeds die out.  I look forward to a day where Ezra and Leo can play in the backyard and not come inside caked with mud.

We are down to four hens.  Jesse found the buff dead in the chicken area one night, no marks on it so we think it just died of natural causes.  The other girls seem fine and are laying eggs for us like crazy.  We have opened up the rest of the yard, the part we didn’t seed with grass, to have them help combat the weeds and they are in heaven!  They are out early every morning, just clucking and scratching around.  The larger area of the yard was meant to be the garden area but we’ve been slow to get any raised beds in this year.  Who knows if that will actually happen.  Baby steps.

We weeded a good portion of the front yard and you can actually see the garden bed dirt again!  I have plans to pretty much rip out everything from the beds by the house and start over but that may need to wait until the fall.  Jesse wants me to save the bulbs and some other flowering plants so I’m not quite sure what I want to do there.

We bought a treadmill and I actually used it!…for about three weeks.  It’s probably been over a month now since I last used it.  I will start using it again, I will.  I was having some really strong foot pain and that seems to have dissipated so it’s probably safe to start again.  I think it’s a real shame there isn’t more plus-size active wear.  It’s very hard to prepare and to be motivated when nothing fits.  I was in Kohl’s the other day and I literally could not find active wear above an XL.

Benny has been doing pretty well.  We’ve been testing leaving him out at night and during the day when we’re gone.  So far, so good.  We still have to make sure we’ve closed all the bedroom and bathroom doors.  Yesterday I came home to find he had brought two different shoes of mine upstairs.  Luckily he hadn’t chewed on them, but I don’t even want to tempt him.  We didn’t use to make him wear his collar unless we went to the dog park but we’ve been leaving that on him now that he has range outside of his crate.  I don’t think he can get out of the yard, but on the off chance that he does I want people to be able to contact us to come get him.


Joline is still the only cat around the house though I am still determined to get a couple kittens this fall.  I think it would help Benny get associated with cats, and it’d be nice to have cats that don’t freak out at the sight of a dog.  Jojo pretty much only comes in now to eat and then leaves again.  She used to come in at night when Benny was in his crate but now that he’s been free at night she has been sleeping outside instead.

Conversation while I was driving with Ezra:

Ezra: Why is there blood in the body?
Me: Because it helps carry oxygen to our organs.
E: What are organs?
Me: Like the heart, lungs, liver, they help make the body work.
E: Like my balls make my penis work!
M: I, uh, (laughing), yes, like your balls make your penis work.

Figured it wasn’t really time to explain anatomy.

I’ve been playing around with new recipes for the soap company.  I’ve created several new soaps and I’m trying to master bubble bars and bath bombs.  I have the bath bombs down pretty well, except they keep expanding overnight while they are drying.  I may need to invest in a dehumidifier.  The bubble bars are completely beyond me at the moment.  The recipes I’ve tried aren’t pliable enough, they are extremely crumbly and won’t hold the rolled log shape.  The product itself works well enough, it creates a lot of bubbles for the bubble bath but I want to be able to mold it in the log and cut slices out of it!  I am also looking into making foaming bath truffles.  I may just say screw it to the bubble bars and do the truffles instead as they both create a bubble bath.

I’m trying to get on some sites like Groupon and LivingSocial, etc., to offer a discount on our products.  I figure even if I just break even it’d be good networking and should bring in a whole new set of buyers.  Fingers crossed!

Ezra and Leo are the best of friends.  They love playing with each other, it melts my heart!